There is a mental state
I strive to achieve a homeostatic state a humming a lull like those alpha wave tapes they sold in the 60's
I need to hear that in my head all day. Instead of the clanging of my thoughts and the clashing of my
wants versus what I should do need to do and the sad, bright violins from "Sunshine" so melancholy
so consistent that remind me how it is not to have anyone understand
Okay, I know it's been a minute but I've been hella busy. I won't go chronologically, just by what takes up most importance in my head at this time:
Strict Vocal Rest:
My baby had his surgery on Friday (4/28) for his Recurrent Respiratory Papillomatosis. He felt the polyps growing back and the dr. went to remove them. Only, when he went to remove them, they weren't polyps. It was a cyst. So the Dr. will let him know on Thursday whether or not the cyst was begnign or malignant. So, I'm already speaking it into existence that it's begnign. This must be the reason that the vocal rest which we originally thought was only going to be 24 hours was extended to 7 days. So, we're back to the routine we had in 2001. Yes or No questions. Over the phone one beep means yes; two means no; three means i love you; four means i love you too. Writing notes to each other, which I keep all of - because I love my baby's handwriting. And just an over all understanding of each other. And honestly, this kind of stuff makes me feel closer to him than ever. Because I really know what he means... even when he uses no words at all. And I've ALWAYS wanted to know someone like that. Good thing I'm marrying him :-D
Hit the Road
I FINALLY TOOK MY 5 HOUR CLASS!!! WOOO HOOO!!!!! It was more like a 3 hour class cause I finished the test early and they let me out at noon to have lunch... (started at 10), came back at 1 and then they let me out at 2:00. My road test is scheduled for June 20th. I'm hella nervous. I drove in the city for the first time on Friday (taking Earl and his mom home from the hospital after his surgery) and boy oh boy. Cabs are crazy. And I'm a hella conservative driver for as much as I love fast cars and the idea of the power of the stick shift, I drove in the fire lane from 71st street alllll the way down to the Manhattan Bridge. (which was also a first for me - being on the Manhattan. I've driven on the Queensboro before). So *crossing my fingers* it's time for THIS sista to have a license.
Best Laid Plans
That's what I've been doing - planning planning planning. I can't wait for brooms to be jumped and babies to be had. I? am tired. I'm just trying to stay sane through it all.
Mache!
Every hour at lunch, I walk for an hour. Pretty brisk pace. And it recenters me for whatever it is I'm planning to do. Plus I've been losing weight for it. I've been doing it for about a solid month now and it's become something that I can't do with out during the weekday. To breathe the semi fresh air (considering NY's air pollution rating) and bask in the sun and take in the blues and greens of the sky and trees respectively had been theraputic to say the least. Here's what it looks like on my path when I'm walking. Who'dda thunk it that folks sun bathe on the Westside Highway? Click here for pics
Pond Hop
I'm leaving on Friday for a 4 day stint in Mexico - Playa del Carmen to be more precise. I hope I have as much fun this time as I did last time. There will DEFINITELY be more a) black folks, b) cats from my department. Seems like the makings of a good time. I went bathing suit shopping. I'm a little self conscious about it though. I'm not divafied like I'd hoped to be, but I'm definitely smaller than I was last year - but I'm thinking I'm the only one who probably notices that. I could use the sun for Max's wedding... so it's just in time. Hoping for a safe flight, bright sunny days, and a happy experience (again) :-D
I guess that's all I can think of right now. There'll be more...
