There is a mental state
I strive to achieve a homeostatic state a humming a lull like those alpha wave tapes they sold in the 60's
I need to hear that in my head all day. Instead of the clanging of my thoughts and the clashing of my
wants versus what I should do need to do and the sad, bright violins from "Sunshine" so melancholy
so consistent that remind me how it is not to have anyone understand
This morning, I woke up feeling really fortunate to be an big, beautiful, intelligent woman. I have so much to offer and I feel blessed by the folks that surround me. Life is at peace for me today and I think I needed it to be. Emotionally / Hormonally, the last few days have been tumultuous. So for a little even keeled-action to come into my life... it makes things a lot easier for me to get through the rest of the week. It's funny, certain things are only in your power when you don't look for them to be. Some of us constantly chase behind having the upper hand in situations, in life or with ourselves. And the harder we try, the more elusive it is. Amazing how when you just stop caring, things just fall into your lap. So, I'm adopting an attitude of laissez-faire for the rest of the month. I chase nothing, because I want for nothing. I have everything I need. It's so liberating.
I have much celebrating to do: My baby and I are going on a date on Friday to Jezebel's (wooooo!!) and then to a Karaoke celebration for my friend BluuLion. Saturday is Jean & Chere's wedding -- so I'll be spending the day looking for something elegant to wear to that. And then Sunday, me and Sug are gonna hang out (or saturday... not sure). Do a little shopping *wink* and just be some girls in the city. Next week doesn't look to be too strenuous work wise -- I banged out a lot of stuff this week, so I should be able to moderatley coast.
