There is a mental state
I strive to achieve a homeostatic state a humming a lull like those alpha wave tapes they sold in the 60's
I need to hear that in my head all day. Instead of the clanging of my thoughts and the clashing of my
wants versus what I should do need to do and the sad, bright violins from "Sunshine" so melancholy
so consistent that remind me how it is not to have anyone understand
I got the call while I was out at lunch that she was waiting for me at reception. I took a call from her at my desk, making sure it was convenient for her to visit with me with relative cool. But the closer I got to my office door, the faster my pace quickened to the point where I was running down the hall. I appeared at the door way and we jumped into each other's arms. We hugged for what seemed to be an hour. The reality of my Sugie being right there all the way from Switzerland and Brazil for the past year dawned on me slowly. I had numbed my sensations in relation to her so I wouldn't feel the lack of her so much and hurt while she was away. But when we finally did disengage our welcome hug, and took a moment to admire each others newness -- tans / lost weight / longer hair -- we jumped RIGHT into it. Back to being best friends as if we never lost touch for a moment. We caught up on as much as we could have stories, detals, emotions sensibilities, wants and desires for the future... I told her throughout the conversation how much I missed her and by the time we were done (rather, our time was up) I felt so much lighter, more positive and happier than I had in a while. I was feeling really down until my best friend surprised me with a visit today!
Then to top off the day, I got my teeshirt in the mail!! WHEEEE!!!! Look:
Turned out to be a really good day. Off to spend time with my baby *tee hee*
