There is a mental state
I strive to achieve a homeostatic state a humming a lull like those alpha wave tapes they sold in the 60's
I need to hear that in my head all day. Instead of the clanging of my thoughts and the clashing of my
wants versus what I should do need to do and the sad, bright violins from "Sunshine" so melancholy
so consistent that remind me how it is not to have anyone understand
I woke up this morning feeling more rested than I thought I would. I had good dreams last night about wealth and leisure time and frivolity. I didn't even realize it was time to wake up. So here I am now deciding what to wear. Forecast says that it'll be 59 degrees tonight. These things are important because the trend these past few days has been warm warm days and nights to chill you to the bone. I won't get caught out there again. But I do have this need to bring spring and summer in. I'm welcoming it for once in my life. Yes, despite the discomfort and the sweatiness and the unbelievable heat and humidity... I'm looking forward to seeing all my trees turn two tone with deep green and light green. I'm looking forward to running to the beach with Jessica in July. I'm looking forward to seeing a friend or two walk down the aisle. I have much to wish the ushering in of the sun for. So I guess I'll begin today.
As I'm sitting here, I can hear pounding coming through my ceiling. I guess I'm not the only one with a spring feeling... *tee hee*. I'm learning not to hate... and to congratulate. Although I'm envious.
Off to start my day. I hope it takes me somewhere I need to be.
