There is a mental state
I strive to achieve a homeostatic state a humming a lull like those alpha wave tapes they sold in the 60's
I need to hear that in my head all day. Instead of the clanging of my thoughts and the clashing of my
wants versus what I should do need to do and the sad, bright violins from "Sunshine" so melancholy
so consistent that remind me how it is not to have anyone understand
It's not too strange to think that's what he'll be remembered as. He was the Superman of my time. Seeing him on the screen made me think... "I wish there was someone like that on the Earth who was that concerned about people's safety and well being." Made me a little sad, so young, that no one was; not even our glorified politicians who swear up and down to make the world a better place. They mean for themselves, I've realized in my wiser age. Anyway... I couldn't help but feel bad. Christopher Reeves could have just been really bitter and died angry and alone after the accident on the horse. He would have mentally balled up a fist to God and damned everything that happened to him. But he fought. He got out there and spoke. As mentally and physically challenging as that may have been for him, he did it as often as he could. I still remember that Superbowl ad that had him CGI getting out of his wheel chair. I don't know anyone who DIDN'T get a chill from that. Because we all wanted to see it happen again. We'd taken it for granted when he could. And now, we all wanted nothing more for him than to be able to walk again. And now he's doing all the things he couldn't before, in a new place.
Rest in Peace, Superman.
It makes me worry... Death comes in threes. I've been able to really notice that pattern now that I'm aware of so many more people passing on. Corey died yesterday... which had me all effed up for the day. I didn't want to go outside...I didn't want to do any work. I just wanted to lay there and feel bad. Because I guess I wasn't feeling bad enough. Now Christopher Reeves... I could easily count Rodney Dangerfield in the lot... finding out about his death was saddening to me. Till my brother said... "he was 82... had a great career... a loving family... what more could you ask for?" Then I guess I didn't feel so bad anymore. That could be 3... But who knows. Inside I'm still waiting for the other shoe to drop. I hope it doesn't hit too close. I'm not sure how I could handle that right now.
