There is a mental state
I strive to achieve a homeostatic state a humming a lull like those alpha wave tapes they sold in the 60's
I need to hear that in my head all day. Instead of the clanging of my thoughts and the clashing of my
wants versus what I should do need to do and the sad, bright violins from "Sunshine" so melancholy
so consistent that remind me how it is not to have anyone understand
That's what SFU (six feet under) is going to stand for for me from now on. Or at least in relation to THIS episode. Folks that know me know I don't (more like can't) really watch wound up stuff. Excessive violence, superflous gore or horridness. I like to say that I haven't been desensitized by the world and still find that stuff to be hard to deal with. Others choose to call me a scaredy cat. Whatever. I'm me and that's how I am. I stopped watching The Sopranos when they felt that they needed to have some kind of craziness in every epsiode. I don't appreciate having to watch a whole show with my hands over my face in the "prepare to cover eyes" position. So I stopped watching. I don't mind suspenseful...but like... old school Twilight Zone was cool. I love thought provoking. But SFU was always my opportunity to co-miserate with others who've lost a loved one. It helps me to not feel alone with these feelings I have about death. But this week's episode was like... as Max put it... Watching a train wreck. My heart was in my throat the whole time and at one point, I had to LEAVE MY ROOM... because I didn't have the wherewithall to change the channel I was so mortified. Usually I watch it a few times on the In Demand channel... but not this week. I will really NOT watch it... and be on the fence about watching the coming week's episode.
The Daily Show never lets me down though... Jon Stewart RULES!!!!
