There is a mental state
I strive to achieve a homeostatic state a humming a lull like those alpha wave tapes they sold in the 60's
I need to hear that in my head all day. Instead of the clanging of my thoughts and the clashing of my
wants versus what I should do need to do and the sad, bright violins from "Sunshine" so melancholy
so consistent that remind me how it is not to have anyone understand
In my attempt to quell the boredom, I'm burying myself under work today. And mingling it with a little "go out and get some fresh air" advice from Mommy.
I might venture so far as to get a PS2 so that I can burn a hole in my retina and form calluses on my thumbs.
Anything to keep my mind off of what it WANTS to think about.
